The hour-long season finale of TLC’s “Honey Boo Boo” is called “It Is What It Is,” and promises grass fights, a family portrait, and the birth of Kaitlyn, plus another pageant for Alana/Honey Boo Boo.
After that, we’ll be seeing Honey Boo Boo and family again around the holidays, as TLC announced they’re going to give us more episodes of the show. They haven’t announced a full second season yet, but it’s certainly only a matter of time with the high ratings this show has drawn for TLC.
The show begins with the family going down to the landing to take a family portrait, starting with a shot of the girls.
Lauryn/Pumpkin: The photo shoot went horrible because it was hot and everybody was irritated.
The photo shoot disintegrates in a shouting match and goes like most family gatherings, except with more gnats.
Mama: In our family, if we’re not yelling at one other, something’s got to be wrong.
When it’s time, the whole family comes down for the picture, and they all smile like they’re getting their teeth x-rayed at the dentist. They’re all yelling and sweating in the 101 degree heat, and Honey Boo Boo wipes her eyes and smears her makeup.
Pumpkin: You look like a football player.
The pictures turn out nice, eventually. Sugar Bear is wearing a clean t-shirt, at least, which is how Mama likes him. Back at the house, Honey Boo Boo is getting ready for the pageant, and trying on her clothes for Mama.
Honey Boo Boo: I’m excited to wear my new swimsuit…Damn! I got gnats on me.
Anna/Chickadee’s stomach hurts, so they take her to the hospital for the birth of Baby Kaitlyn, who was smart enough to wait until the season finale to be born.
Mama: In a way I think Anna’s ready for Kaitlyn, but in a lot of ways I think no because she doesn’t even realize her life is fixing to change.
Baby Kaitlyn Elizabeth arrives quickly, at six pounds, two ounces and nineteen inches long. Mama and Sugar Bear are noticeably moved by the new grandbaby.
Honey Boo Boo: Baby Kaitlyn arrived on the biscuit express.
Baby Kaitlyn is born with “something special,” as Mama calls it, and that something extra is another thumb. She has two thumbs on her right hand.
Mama: Kaityln is highly evolved.
Chubbs gives her a “High Six,” and the family moves on.
Sugar Bear: Having that extra thumb reminds me of a Swiss Army knife.
Jessica/Chubbs: She smelled bad, not like bad like raunchy biscuit bad, I mean bad like…formula smelling bad.
At home, Honey Boo Boo takes her chalk and scrawls a welcome message for Kaitlyn in their driveway. She’s glad to see her new niece.
Honey Boo Boo: Baby Kaitlyn is so tiny…I POOP BIGGER!!
Honey Boo Boo is missing a pageant over the weekend, since Baby Kaitlyn is coming home.
Honey Boo Boo: I’m really excited to find out what a new baby smells like. It’s gonna smell like sunshine and happiness! Or poop.
They bring Anna and Kaitlyn home, and let Honey Boo Boo hold her for the first time.
Chickadee: She gets really bad heartburn, she gets really gassy.
Honey Boo Boo: Well if she gets gassy, she’s one of the family.
That might be the best line of the season. Mama tells Honey Boo Boo she’s found a pageant for her in two days.
(For part two of this article, please click here.)