“When you connect to the silence within you, that is when you can make sense of the disturbance going on around you.”
― Stephen Richards
Those of us who are overweight are that way because we are “getting something” out of it. It is a scientific and religious fact that all human beings have choice. We make choices all day, every day. Most of these choices we make without even thinking about them. How we choose to eat is one of the myriad of choices that we’ve placed on autopilot, but for the vast majority of us, that pilot does not have our best interest at heart. Somewhere along the line, those of us who misuse food have inadvertently trained that pilot to make important food decisions based on emotions including but not limited to; fear, self-loathing, confusion, anger, regret, angst, depression, shame, or some other adjective that is not conducive to self-actualization or positive personal growth. It is our job to figure out what “pay off” we get from being overweight.
The simple answers such as, “My life is too busy for me to eat right.” or “My family doesn’t like vegetables and I am too tired to fight with them about it.” or “I get sucked into eating out with my friends all the time.” or “I love food too much.” are all excuses that we tell ourselves to cover up the underlying truth which is that we are fundamentally getting a PAYOFF for being the weight that we are.
There may not be an obvious payoff, there may be and probably are more than one payoffs; but it’s up to you to figure out why you feel you need to be overweight so that you can figure out a healthy alternative to satiate that need.
Your Homework for Day 1:
Grab your 50 D of F journal, get comfortable in your special place and start writing about The Why. We all know why you DON’T want to be overweight but what advantages are you getting from being obese? Is your fat an emotional insulation? Keeping you from being noticed? A way to feel in control? An isolation technique? A barrier to intimacy? A form of self-punishment? Keeping you from taking risks in life?
If you’re having trouble coming up with some possible reasons, ask a friend, your kids, perhaps your spouse to help you brainstorm about what you could possibly be getting from being fat and unhealthy? Write. Observe. Report. And above all, FEEL NO GUILT! This exercise might be very emotional for you, it certainly was for me. Your courage will be well worth it in the end. Remember to observe without judgement the foods and drinks you consume throughout the day. Record them and how they make you feel as accurately as possible in your food journal. The more aware you become of your eating habits and how certain foods make you feel, the better equipped you will be to pinpoint the habits that are the most detrimental to your success. Be sure to find a way to reward yourself in a way that does not involve food for all your honesty and hard work today.
Have a fabulous first day!!