Frugal living and senior living seem to be two phrases that don’t belong in the same sentence. Too many seniors today are having a time of it trying to make ends meet with the small pension or whatever means of income they may get. What resources are available for our seniors? Perhaps if they knew they could tap into some of them to make life just a bit easier. I will list a few that I know of in hopes that it might help someone out there. If you know of resources, please list them in the comments section below. Thank you so much for you input.
Many of us baby boomers have now reached the age where we are finding ourselves in the position to care for our parents. This can be a difficult job if our loved ones are displaying symptoms of dementia or have some other chronic disease. The other factor that nobody ever wants to mention is the “reap what you sow” factor. Unfortunately we may find ourselves resenting having to care for someone that, in our opinion, wasn’t there for us. Perhaps our mother or father was the kind of parent that was not nurturing or was down right horrible. So now what do you do? Ignore the fact that they need your help? Hopefully not. Hopefully you are the kind of person that can overlook and forgive the shortcomings of your parent and do the right thing. Let’s take the two following examples and see where you fall in. Both examples are true and both of these two women had seven children.
Mom number 1, mother of seven, four boys and three girls. Mom number one did an excellent job keeping the house clean and keeping food on the table. She was married to a military man for thirty years and traveled about with him, and as her family grew, so did the children. Finally settling down to one location they had a normal life. That is except for the beatings if the children didn’t do their chores. But the children had three square meals a day and even had dessert every night. Mom worked outside the home and depended on everyone doing their part, but if they didn’t, they suffered the consequences. Dad was often not there so much of the responsibility fell to mom. As the children grew they began to recognize that their mom was not the nurturing kind, in fact had not a kind word for anyone. They did their chores because they had to not because they wanted to and as they grew up they left home as soon as possible. Now mom is in her eighties, one son lives out of state, and of the six left in the area only one of them pays her any attention and occasionally two others will visit. She wants attention from her children yet receives only birthday cards and phone calls on Mother’s day and Christmas time. Unfortunately for her mom #1 is reaping what she had sown. Now let’s take mom number 2.
Mom number 2 also had seven children, four boys and three girls. Mom number 2 was married to an alcoholic. Life was crazy most of the time. She managed to work full time to raise the kids and on weekends worked harder doing laundry and cooking to get ready for the coming week. Mom number 2 always hugged her kids and told them she loved them. Mom number 2 talked to her children and the house was always a mess. Except on weekends when she took charge and got everyone to help. Monday would roll around and the week would start all over again. There was fighting and arguing and beating of the kids by the dad. The marriage finally ending in divorce. Mom continued to work full time to raise the four left at home since dad didn’t contribute much if at all. Now mom number 2 is in her eighties and all of her children are involved in her life. Why? The reap what you sow factor. She treated her children with love, she nourished her children with love.
Neither of these situations were ideal, but they were true, and they show what can happen later in life with a person when one does not take into consideration that children grow up. How you treat them now may come back to bite you or to help you. But in the mean time we have seniors out there that need help regardless of the reap what you sow factor. What will you do? Choose to be cold and heartless because you are carrying years of resentment on your back? Why not try the Emotional Freedom Technique and get rid of the weight of your childhood and help your parent out anyway? Far too many are in nursing homes when they could be living with a family member. Of course every situation is different, we may not be able to provide what they need, but if we can will we?
Here are some resources that may fill the need you may have and if you can add a comment to encourage or be supportive in anyway please do so in the comments section below: